There was so much speculation about your date of marriage. What eventually made you decide on marriage?
There has always been a lot of pressure on us, from both sides, to get married. Yash uncle kept telling me, 'Get married' and that is the only regret in my life that we didn't get married in front of him. Our initial plan was to get married right after Jab Tak Hai Jaan. But, as destiny would have it, that was not meant to be and we had to wait for a year. Everyone close to us knew that we would get married and there was no suspense or doubt about that. The doubt was only amongst people who did not want us to get married. Adi has been so busy and I wanted him to be a little easier when we got married. In people's minds, who don't really know us, our marriage was hyped, but in our heads, it was always a yes we will, but then Yash uncle had expired and then one day we decided since Adi was a little free this year, we would get married. It may sound uncanny, but the day we decided is the day my dad got an attack.
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It was 2 at night when mom called to say come as dad had got an attack. For one minute, we had actually lost him. I was shooting and Adi and I reached dad and got him operated. They fitted an advanced pacemaker inside his heart. And we asked the doctor if we could take him for a family holiday and if he could travel. He asked, 'How many hours is the flight?' and once we said 6-7 hours, he gave us permission. We prayed and prayed as, if something would have happened to dad, then we would have had to cancel everything. We took him with us for three days, he did my kanyadaan and he came back. Adi and me stayed back. Can you imagine that as soon as my dad came back, the next day he was again admitted in the ICU for his kidney problem. Everytime I called him from there, my mom would hide it from me as the doctors and she had decided to keep me out of the loop till I returned. I came back after a week and as soon as I landed, I asked my mom to give dad the phone and that is when she told me that he had been admitted. From the airport, I went straight to Breach Candy hospital where I stayed with him for the next 20 days.
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Talk about your wedding?
We went to Italy as we thought it would be beautiful and the weather would be nice. We were just 15 of us and Adi wanted to take over an entire hotel, so we did that. We had decided so fast that within four days, I got my wedding lehenga made. I always wanted to get married the Bengali way. And he sweetly listened to everything and was very much a Bengali groom.
Has life changed for you post marriage?
Marriage is very hyped, I would say. The only change is that physically I go and stay in his house. I am married to a man, who is very modern in his thinking even though very traditional in his heart. There are no rules laid down for me and I feel I am married into my own family. Of course, my parents miss me as I don't get to see them everyday, but I try to make sure that I see them as often as I can.
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Talk about Adi and you?
Adi calls me a 24-hour entertainment channel. He says, 'You never know at what point which channel she can come to.' With me, you have to give love to get love and he loves me a lot. He likes the quality that I am so unabashed. We both are dominating, but I am a little more in the house. I am a full Bengali that way and, I think, he likes that about me, as I don't think anyone can control him. He is very happy being controlled. Even Pam aunty is happy with that and she tells me that.
Talk about Pamela Chopra?
I am practical, but I am also romantic at heart and have grown up watching Yash uncle's Chandni and Lamhe. In any house where women are respected, the household will prosper and I think that Yash uncle prospered because the men of their house treat their ladies really well and with equality. And they have a lot of love and respect for them. When I see Pam aunty today, I find her an amazing woman and when I hear stories of Yash uncle and Adi's childhood from her, I realise that Yash uncle's strength lies with her as she was always there, even professionally. He would bounce off his scripts to her and they were a wonderful couple. He would always pull her leg and she would blush. She is such an independent and modern-minded woman and I admire that about her. She is such a dynamic personality and I look up to her as an individual. I admire the way she battled her cancer and yet, she is so spirited and is a beautiful looking woman. Adi loves her. Adi and I aspire that our relationship is like Yash uncle and hers.
You seem to be a secure person?
All we need in life is to be happy, eat well and sleep well. As long as these three things in life are there, what else can shake you? Luckily for me, I became the bread- earner for my family very early and therefore became wise very early. I have seen my parents struggle from very close quarters, so have always put my want and wish behind everything. And today, because Adi has known this about me, my wish is his command. The really big change post marriage is that I truly feel like a queen. Because for Adi, his sole purpose is to make me happy. People around me tell me that since I have dedicated my life to my parents, this was God's way of balancing out. To give me a man who loves me the way my parents do. Adi and I are probably made of the same fibre. He spoils me rotten and keeps saying, 'I just want to spoil you.' It's strange that he is the only person in my life where I was very happy that he was spoiling me. I have never liked others doing anything for me and I have always done things on my own. I have always been the giver. But in my relationship with Adi, I love him being the giver. I hear about independent working women feeling awkward taking money from their husbands, but I don't feel awkward at all. I just feel that I was meant to be here, meant to be his lover and wife. He always says, 'I was born to love you.' He will tell me, 'Take this money, go and splurge.' But one thing I have learnt from him is the value of money. He never splurges unnecessarily. Since I have earned my own money, I would spend it the way I wanted to, but Adi despite being large-hearted is very khandaani. For instance, he will say, 'Why do you want to buy three things if you need one?' And I have tried to spoil him by buying him five things which he does not want. So we are a good balance. I love everything about him except that he is too workaholic.
Why is Adi so elusive?
If you are in this profession, you are in it for work and not for the parties you attend. You are valued for how good you are in your work and not with how much you can entertain in a party. He meets everybody and he prefers intimate get-togethers. Adi's way of unwinding is to come home and eat good food, watch TV or see a good film. I love the fact that he is elusive and that he does not want to go anywhere. So I don't need to dress up and go anywhere and I love that about him. If I was to have a man who was too social, I would have hated it. I am too happy that he doesn't go anywhere. The kind of personality he is I could have fallen in love with only this kind. He is in the industry and yet is not in it. The reason I got attracted to him is that he is so not there. And I am just like him. If you ask my mother she will say, 'I have to kick Rani to go outside.' And I have been like that since I was a kid. She would always be forcing my brother to take me out. Also Adi enjoys being in complete touch with the audience and likes to live the life of anonymity as he wants to do the normal things. And that is where he gets his inspiration for his movies from. I keep hearing from him all the time how now he hates the fact that I have made him slightly popular due to his pictures coming out in the media. And that is the only thing he despises me for being in his life.
Are you looking at starting a family?
Of course, as that is why we are married. And I want to expect soon. Every woman is born to procreate and God has given us that magic power to bring another human being into the world. So, why should we not use that and play God for once? A woman comes closest to being God when she creates another being. Adi always teases me, 'You are born to become a mother. You should have had babies when you were born only.' So yes, I am completely looking forward to becoming a mother. But movies is my first love and that is what has given me confidence and a say in this world. It has also given me a big family in the film industry and today I am married into a family that has only made love stories. I have a lot to be thankful for. And I definitely feel that whenever I will get a good script, I will work. Adi is also today's man and admires women who are working. He will never ask me to not work. He will not enjoy me being a housewife and will respect me more if I am working. Working is a luxury being in a family in which I am and I won't give that away. Now whether it is working as an actor or behind the scenes, that only time can tell. But I can say very confidently that I will work all my life.
Do you miss Yash Chopra?
I have never met a more beautiful person in my life than Yash uncle. I say this as his actress, as his daughter-in-law and someone who had a relationship with him. During the last almost four years that I was Adi's girlfriend, Yash uncle was there with me for two years and during that time he showered a lot of love and gave me a lot of blessings. We would go out to eat out and I would bake cakes for him. What I loved most about him was that he treated everyone equally. He had a lot of life in him. At his age, he needed to see his grandchildren and I wish he was alive to see us married.
Did you cry on your wedding remembering him?
I cried and I knew it had to happen. Adi thinks I have a tap and can cry at the drop of a hat. The beautiful thing about the wedding was that Adi told me on the flight, 'Dad is going to be with us on our wedding day.' I said, 'If he is there, then it will rain' as he used to love the rains. And it so happened that there was a storm just before I entered the mandap. Adi looked at me and I looked at him and we both smiled and we knew he had come.
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