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You have backed many directors, be it Imtiaz Ali, Rajkumar Santoshi or Anil Sharma. What makes you do that?
Life is all about your instincts. I have always preferred to work with guys who have that do-or-die spirit in them and who love their job. The first time I turned producer was with Ghayal. Raj Santoshi narrated the script to me. I don't know why, but the original producer had run away. But I liked the way Raj narrated it. I took him to other producers, but they did not like the subject. I couldn't understand what was wrong with it as I had liked it a lot. So I took him to Rajasthan, where my dad was shooting and made him hear it. He liked it too and I took his permission to produce it. We then had a lot of people tell us what we needed to change in it to make it work, but we decided to go with our conviction. I always shun people who tell me while narrating that there will be a clap at this point. That's the way I am as I don't want to know how it will turn out to be. I don't believe in manipulation. In fact, I believe in justice and feel that if there is someone who I don't like but he has done something good, he deserves it. The industry does not think the way the audience thinks, but Anilji (Sharma) is a far greater director than 99% of the directors in our industry right now. He may not have a profile like theirs, but his films have a soul.
Anil Sharma says that you don't allow people to b**ch about other people in front of you. Is that true?
I don't like negativity and speaking bad things about people. If it gives you satisfaction, it's fine, but doing it just to boost your own ego is wrong.
Let's talk about your father, Dharamji?
Dad is everything to me. He is a giving father. He is the most good-looking guy who is the best at everything that he does. He is not shy of anything. For him, if something is right, it is right. If something is wrong, it is wrong. I only watched his films. To me, he was and is till date, the best man, actor and the best human being.
How are you as a father?
I am strict. When you tell your child to not do some things, you are called bad, but, actually, you are the right person. You are obviously saying it for his good. If you don't tell him what is wrong, he will grow up and ask you why you did not tell him what was wrong when he was younger. So I just feel whatever you feel is wrong should be corrected right there and then. At the end of the day, a child will take his own decisions. He will say yes in front of you and will, in any case, do whatever he has to behind your back. We have also done that but at least we have to tell them what is wrong. A father needs to bring in that discipline. A father has to be a father. A mother has to be a mother. A friend has to be friend. If a father is going to be a friend, then who will be the father? When a person cannot be a father, he will be a friend. A father will not encourage a child to do what is wrong, whereas a friend would try and understand it.
Dharamji said you will even borrow money to help others.
If I can help anybody, I will. I don't think about the ability to pay back. I just feel that if I don't help him I will feel guilty later.
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Both Bobby and Abhay said that they wished you had not been so disciplined.
For my brothers, going to bed early is discipline. To me, that is only a certain way of life. I love being up in the morning and start shooting in the morning. Like them, I too had restrictions put on me as a child and I, too, did not like it then, but definitely that is what has made me the way I am today. It's not that I didn't do things that my parents did not like.
But Bobby and Abhay saw me when I was much older and did not see me when I was their age. I was basically like any other child who wanted to do anything that I was not allowed to do, as that is every child's instinct. I was never into parties and was always an early morning guy. I never liked darkness. Even when I saw a film, I would see it in the morning, but never in the afternoon, and if I came out and saw that it had become evening, I did not like it and felt that I had wasted my time. I used to relate only to day. Night, for me, was time to sleep. I am still like that. Even now if I get up after the sun is out, I don't like it and feel I should have got up earlier.
How different are Bobby and Abhay from each other?
Abhay is a boy who can venture out and do things by himself if he wants to. He is a free kind of person. Bobby is more of a well-knit family person. Unfortunately we are to be blamed for him being the baby of the house, protecting him so much. First it was dad and then me. I wish I was not like that and had let him more free.
How did you get into films?
I was born in our village (Sahnewal) in the house. Mom tells me it was around 8 or 8.30 in the evening when the train used to pass the village. We moved to Mumbai with my dad when I was very small. I couldn't watch too many films as I would get a headache. In school, we went through the process of being dad's son. Some teachers would be extra nice and some nasty. I was interested more in sports than studies, but could not pursue sports due to restrictions in our house, even though I was in every school team for every sport. I decided to become an actor, but was very shy. So I went to a theatre school in Birmingham in England for a year-and-a-half and that is where I opened up, as no one knew who I was and that felt very nice. That was a time I tried everything, including alcohol and smoking, but I did not like it. Unless you taste it, you won't know if you like it. I found it yuck and neither liked the smell of a cigarette or the taste of alcohol and therefore I don't consume either. I came back and got launched in our own production Betaab.
Who is your emotional anchor?
I am a family guy. I am basically my own person, but my mother is there for me. She is the person who has shouted at you and beaten you the most, but she is also the one you love the most. And that is not to say that I love my dad any less. Even though my mother was strict, I would take advantage of her. She would hit me, scold me, but I would still do what I wanted to. Actually, I would get hit by everybody in my family and there is nobody who has not hit me. When mummy scolded me, we would go to my dadi so that she could scold my mother. Now I see my mother do the same thing. Dadis are always used for temporary relief versus your mother. We also have our values because of my dadi. If my dad would abuse a servant, she would ask them to abuse him back.
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Yes, it did affect me a lot, but that does not mean you sit back and sulk. You just move on to the next film. For the last couple of years, things have not been the way I would have liked them to be, but I don't take that to heart and feel that the best thing in life is to not analyse as that is a wastage of time. There is hard work, time and luck. I believe in God and in being a good human being. Ever since I joined the industry, I have gone through bad health due to my back, but I never let it affect me. When I was young, I felt I was invincible and that put me into a lot of problems, as I would do all my stunts myself knowing fully well that I was not a stunts guy. I would not bother if I got hurt. I would get backaches and would just carry on thinking it was a muscle pull, till I needed to be operated upon. But post-operation, I would go back to do stunts that I was advised against. During my third operation, I ran away from the hospital. The pain I have, only someone with a back pain can understand. It paralyses you, where you can't even move an inch. In my career of 30 years, I have spent five years in bed due to my backache. For me, age is just a number. But I still do what I want, as I don't want to be a slave to my body. In an industry where today everything is an arrangement, I know that your only wealth is your family.
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In my 30-year career, I have spent five years in bed due to my backache: Sunny Deol
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