Mumbai Mirror Oct 12, 2012, 12.00AM IST
(5 Signs she wants sex (Thinkstock…)
Focus on what she's not telling you in bed by reading her body language
It's a universally accepted fact that women are complicated, confusing beings who, in spite of talking incessantly, rely a lot on non-verbal communication to convey their inner-most thoughts. So it's left to you to unravel the mystery of their look, sigh or grump.
Since they manage to take the same trait into the bedroom and you might find yourself befuddled at her reactions, wondering if she's rubbing up against you out of extreme desire or as a distraction tactic to get you to stop doing what you're doing. We help you decode her subtle body language in bed, so you're abreast of whether you're doing it right or need to up your ante. If you manage to read your cues right, you'll be suitable rewarded and her body will display overall signs of arousal that can't be faked. Here are a few:
In her arms
If instead of holding you, her arms are held close to her body, there might be a little something going on, you should take note of. In some positions she might need her arms to support her weight, but in most cases, if she's consciously holding her arms close, she is clearly not letting go with wild abandon. She shouldn't want to be covering herself up. If however, they're above your or her head, on your chest, splayed out on the sheets or held out on either side, it's her way of telling you, she's comfortable with where she is and there's no need to hold back.
Breathing heavy
This is usually a dead give away and impossible to mask or fake. As the body is excited and turned on, the breath becomes more urgent and rapid. Involuntary moans are made as air rapidly makes its way through her vocal chords. The heart rate increases as the body prepares for an orgasm, making her internal organs demand more oxygen. A thumping heart rate and urgent breathing should let you know that you're on the right track. However, if immediately after a big orgasm, she's back to a slow restful pace of breath, you just witnessed a big show.
Writhing heights
When a body enthusiastically responds to another, it urges for proximity. If she's grinding or pushing herself against you, trying to hold or hug you, her body language is as inviting as it gets. Curling toes are another good indicator, but try to catch a glance offhand. If the motion is subconscious, it's probably genuine. If however, she's lying there waiting for you to do all the hard work, there's probably a little that's happening in terms of arousal for her. You need to regroup and restart. Try changing positions or focus on her erogenous zones to get her attention.
Hip action
A little known secret about good sex is that it's tremendously synchronized. The way the bodies were designed, they were meant to move repeatedly in the same motion until both achieved a climax. So if you find her matching your moves, you've hit the right notes and just need to make it to the finish line. Sometimes it takes a little time to get in sync but if you don't see it happening, chances are that her body is telling you it wants something else, another position perhaps. Wait for her to respond with the same intensity.
In the deep
Once you are in the zone and aiming for the finish, given the sensitivity of organs involved, you should be able to feel her strong internal muscles act against yours. With spasms and some amount of clenching, you'll get a good idea of how well you're doing. However, don't use it as a benchmark since not all women have the same amount of control over their kegel muscles. Some amount of contraction and relaxation that you may feel could be for her own pleasure, but pay close attention to what her overall intensity is telling you.
What works for one woman may never work for another but the idea is to be attuned to the feedback her body language is giving you. If you feel like you're not in sync, pause and try something new. Avoid sticking to a routine or becoming predictable. Spice things up with experimentation, teasing and tantalizing your partner and keep an eye out for fake moans and forced emotions.
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